“Proclaim the message; persist in it whether convenient or not; rebuke, correct, and encourage with great patience and teaching. For the time will come when they will not tolerate sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, will multiply teachers for themselves because they have an itch to hear something new.” (2 Tim. 4:2-3)
The verse says “the time will come;” and I think we’re there.
In our “time,” churches, Christian blogs, and online magazines race to find new material and put “relevant,” “contemporary,” and “culturally-engaged” stakes in the ground. (After watching this video, our pastor and wife refer to this phenomena as “contemporvent.”)
As women of the Word, this means we must be even more diligent to KNOW the message God has given us, and to do what this passage instructs– “persist in it whether convenient or not.”
WHETHER CONVENIENT OR NOT
Sometimes God’s Word ISN’T “convenient.” We can begin to feel that it would be easier if we could just ignore the things our culture finds distasteful: submission & headship in marriage, God’s hatred for divorce, and His thoughts about “hot topics” like homosexuality, female pastors, sex outside of marriage, and spanking.
But this passage warns us: don’t only embrace the convenient parts of Scripture!
It warns us to watch out for a heart that desires something new and different. It should sound a little alarm if you find yourself wishing for a religion thats’s a little easier, or wanting to ignore certain parts of Scripture in favor of others. That’s exactly what Paul had in mind.
AN ITCH TO HEAR SOMETHING NEW
Verse 3 describes our culture, doesn’t it?
“…they will not tolerate sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, will multiply teachers for themselves because they have an itch to hear something new.”
Sadly, this isn’t just true of a random Christian here or there. It’s true of entire churches across the nation, and many Christian events and conferences. “Sound doctrine” is rarely sought out. In fact, sound doctrine is seen as stodgy and judgmental.
Instead, teachers who are “engaging” and “fresh” are promoted onto local and national stages. Humor and affability trump faithfulness to God’s Word.
And women’s events can be among the worst of the worst in this regard.
As godly women, we should work to persist in the message that has been the same since it was proclaimed over 2,000 years ago. In our homes as we worship and teach our children, we need to purposefully run toward “sound doctrine,” and be on the watch for an “itch” to hear some new idea, doctrine, or presentation.
Consider:
If we answer “yes” to questions like these, verse 3 is describing not just the culture around us– it’s describing US.
We have to be sober-minded in our engagement with teaching and not just sit back and accept what we’re told without scrutiny. In Acts 17:11, Paul praised the Bereans for examining the Scriptures “DAILY” to be sure that what they were being taught was right. Like them, we can’t afford to sit back in this culture of lukewarm easy-believism and just assume that what we’re reading or hearing is correct.
Even if it’s being said at a church or “Christian” gathering.
Just a few verses before this, Paul reminds us that all of God’s Word is profitable, and meant to teach, sharpen, and equip us. We must be women, wives, daughters, sisters, mothers, friends who KNOW the Word well, so that we can discern truth and rightly counsel the people around us. We need to KNOW sound doctrine, so that we can recognize UNSOUND doctrine.
This passage tells us to “proclaim” and “persist” in the message we have been given. We should stand as fierce gatekeepers over the messages that enter our own ears, and the ears of our children while they are in our care.
Are you doing that in your home, family, and among the people God has enabled you to influence?
Father, renew our minds so that we will be women who pursue Your Word rather than a new-and-improved message. Give us discerning hearts so that we will hold all teaching up to the light of Scripture for full examination. Don’t let us be women who flit from teacher to teacher with an itch to hear something new.
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Tagged Bible, contemporvant, local church, sound doctrine 
- Are you spiritually “stuck?”
- Feeling like you have questions but no answers?
- Stagnant in life but unsure how to start growing again?
I was 16 years old when it began. I was a coming-out-of-rebellion teen; she was a young mom (in her 20s) with 3 little ones. In free moments of my busy high school life, I’d hang out with her while she raised her little people. As we watched the kids splash in the pool and play with army men, she and I had conversations that formed a foundation for my own mothering choices that would begin just 6-7 years later.
Though we didn’t use this word, and it wasn’t anything formalized, she was my first “mentor.”
Playing with her kids, and talking about life, Scripture, and family came easily. The discomfort came when, a few years later, she would ask me questions like: “why do you think God didn’t let the two of you date & end up together the way you thought you would?”
I didn’t want to answer that question. To me, it reeked of my failure. It was, undoubtedly, because I didn’t deserve a guy like that.
Of course, now, in hindsight, I know why God didn’t let me date that guy: because God meant me for Doug. But at that time, the question unsettled me and challenged my thinking. Frustrated by the insufficient answer that came out of my lips, the question kept churning in my brain until the answer, eventually, came to rest on God and not on me.
Later, when I was a young bride, she challenged me with questions like, “have you ever asked Doug if he thinks you take the lead too much in y’all’s relationship?”
“No.”
“I’ll ask my husband if you ask yours.”
I gulped. I’m pretty sure we both did, cause she’s a pretty feisty gal too. But that night, we both went home and asked our husbands that hard question.
That one simple question, and the answer Doug gave (if you’re curious, it was, “yeah… sometimes…”) planted seeds for a season of growth. Over time it has rendered significant and powerful changes in our marriage that are at the core of who we are as individuals, as a couple, and as a family.
I’m so grateful for that heart-challenging question, asked by someone older and wiser. Over the years God refined my understanding of Him, myself, and His world through heart-probing questions like these.
The truth is this:
- IT IS GOOD TO BE UNSETTLED.
- IT IS GOOD TO HAVE YOUR THINKING CHALLENGED BY PEOPLE WHO ARE GODLIER THAN YOU ARE.
- IT IS GOOD TO HAVE TO THINK THROUGH IDEAS THAT ARE DIFFERENT THAN THE ONES YOUR BRAIN NATURALLY COMES UP WITH ON ITS OWN
We don’t WANT to want these things, but we should want them.
Proverbs 13:20 tells us: “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.”
Since that time, I’ve had a variety of mentors, short-term or long-term, in my life. Here are some of the characteristics I look for:
- A woman farther down the road than I am- for me that has been in a variety of areas: parenting… keeping a clean & tidy home… raising godly, enjoyable children… hospitality… language learning (when we lived overseas)… homeschooling… Bible study… a gentle spirit. Each “mentor” has offered different things and possessed different strengths. I look for women who are strong in areas where I need to grow.
- Someone who is godlier than I am- it is easy to spend time with someone who lets me “just be me” so I can “let it all hang out.” It is harder to spend time with someone who will call me out for faulty, unbiblical thinking, or who will make me aware of areas where I am weak. But it is BETTER to do the harder thing. I look for women who challenge me to be more like God, rather than women who make it easy for me to think “I’m doing all right.”
- Someone who is available. It does me no good to keep “trying to get together” with someone whose schedule is already jam-packed. As a teen, I sat with my mentor in the middle of her busy-at-home life. When I was the busy-at-home mom, I spent time each week with a woman in her 50s who came over during nap time to prod me along in disciplined Bible study. Now that I’m a newly-postpartum-mom-of-7, it looks like going for walks each week with a newly-empty-nested mom. I look for women who are able and willing to make regular time together.
Just this week, I went walking with my friend and as I was telling her a story about my growing up years, she offered a different way of thinking about it. She was questioning part of the “frame” or “lens” through which I was looking at the story.
And you know what?
She was right. I needed to see it with more grace and less bitterness than I was. It was good for me to have her nudge me in a direction other than the one that came to me naturally.
COULD THIS SHAKE UP YOUR SPIRITUAL STAGNANCY?
- Are you willing to have your thoughts challenged?
- Could you grow by having a mentor that inspires you in an area where you are weak?
- Are you spiritually stuck because you don’t have anyone around who calls out your faulty thinking?
Look around your current “circle.” —-> Who has God put within your reach who is further down the road than you, godlier than you (or at least won’t excuse your sin/buy your excuses), and available for regular time together?
Perhaps you could reach out to her this week?
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Tagged community, friendship, Grow on purpose, mentoring, Older women, spiritual growth, Titus 2 Woman, Titus2, We need one another!, Younger women 
Wanna know what my kids have for lunch these days?
It’s pretty much the same thing every day: homemade lunchables. Thin deli-sliced ham or turkey, and cheese, with Ritz. Sometimes I have fresh fruit on hand to go with it. Other times, it’s canned fruit, nuts, or packaged cookies.
It’s not in cute Bento boxes. It doesn’t include kale, whole-grain-anything, or almond butter. (Except on accident.) But you know what it is?
It’s good enough.
And you know what that lets me do?
It lets me be sane.
I’m kidding.
Kind of.
Truth is, there are seasons where aiming for perfect is going to do one or all of the following:
- steal your time
- steal your joy
- push you into the emotional “red zone”
- make you feel incompetent (when, really, you’re just being a normal weak human person)
- use up your precious energy and precious time on things that really don’t matter that much
In this postpartum season, homemade lunchables are an easy, inexpensive lunch I don’t have to think about. Heck, I don’t even have to be present at the table. If I’m nursing, or sitting on the couch, or tidying something, or laying the baby down, they can still manage lunch. It’s filling. It includes most of the food groups.
It’s good enough.
That same-thing-most-every-day lunch helps me be a better mom. I’m a better mom to Luke, because I can keep sitting and nursing or snuggling him longer. I’m a better mom to all of them because I have more time and mental energy to devote to the things that matter more than lunch– math lessons, reading practice, character training, and enough mental space left over to admire the Lego creations brought to me.
I’m also a better wife because I’m not crazy-ville-stressed by the time Doug walks through the door. (At least, not most days.)
You might be sitting there thinking one of the following:
- “BUT FOOD MATTERS TO ME; I love cooking!”
- “I *want* my kids to eat kale in cheery-toned bento boxes.”
- “We have kids with allergies.”
- “Lunch meat is the worst ever and I wouldn’t feed it to my worst enemy.”
- “My kids are too little to get lunch for themselves.”
Here’s the thing:
Food is one of MY “good enoughs.” Every now and then there’s something I care about and want to make (vanilla-rum pecan pie with shortbread crust, I’m looking at you right now), but for the most part, when it comes to cooking & menu-making, good enough is the address where I live.
But food may not be your “good enough.”
Your “good enough” might be:
- Throwing all the dishrags in the drawer, unfolded
- Using paper plates for a season, instead of dishes, guilt-free
- Throwing all the kids in the same bath, twice a week, rather than more often
- Opting to invest in a backyard play structure to simplify your life by providing outdoor playtime without running to several practices and games each week
- Tossing all flatware in a drawer rather than sorting it, to save a few minutes here and there (that’s how my awesome friend Katie rolls)
- Reading through a chapter of Proverbs aloud over breakfast, rather than feeling guilty & ashamed because you never seem to manage “family worship” time like the preacher talks about
Sometimes, “GOOD ENOUGH” is:
- what separates stress and sanity
- the thin line between emotional breakdowns and emotional margin
- the difference between getting it done or not
- the thing that enables GREAT things to happen in other areas
and sometimes… sometimes… there really are times when “good enough” is “awesome.”
When you embrace “good enough” in some areas of your life, it can free you up, mentally, emotionally, physically… and create just enough space in your SOUL… for you to stay sane, do some (other) things GREAT, and live life with joy & delight.
What’s one area where you need to STOP feeling guilty and START embracing “good enough?”
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Tagged food wars, Grace, large family, life with littles, make the best use of the time, Postpartum 
Years ago, Doug & I went through a Grip-Birkman training session— which combines personality & spiritual gifts in order to help teams of Believers work together.
One of the verses the trainer focused on has continued to convict and challenge me in the years since:
“by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.” ~Romans 12:3
During the training, we were each paired off with someone who did not know us, and each pair was given the assignment to soberly, judiciously, talk through specific things:
- What spiritual gifts we’d seen God use in us
- Walk through specific instances where those gifts had been used
- Identify what spiritual gifts others had affirmed/noticed IN us
The partner assigned to us was meant to act as an unbiased examiner and sounding board, helping us think critically, dispassionately, and sober-mindedly about the ways God had used us within the Body of Christ.
It was a great exercise, and confirmed some things in our lives that God continues to use to shape and help Doug & I as we reach decision-making moments. Soberly considering how God has worked in our lives in the past, and remembering how He has used us in His Kingdom, helps us to consider where to invest NOW.
So that is one way God has used the verse in my life– to help me soberly consider the past in order to understand how God has built me as an individual.
A second way God is using the verse in my life is to challenge me to soberly consider the present (who and where I am, today).
SOBER ESTIMATION OF ME, TODAY
When I do that honestly & soberly, I’m humbled & given specific areas for growth. I’ve thought for pretty much my whole life that I’m a strong woman. But God is showing me a lot of areas where I am weak.
One is this: my anger “fuse” is too short. I light up and explode far too easily. That is ESPECIALLY a temptation in the trying-to-find-a-new-normal postpartum days. So I’ve been working on that, lately, in these ways:
- Trying to purposefully lower my voice when I sense irritation growing.
- Lowering my expectations of others… particularly my children– reminding myself often of their humanness & what I was like at their age(s).
- Raising my expectations of myself (in regard to self-control– I’m not “faking it”… but actually walking in the self-control that IS mine in Christ Jesus).
- And asking for forgiveness quickly when I choose sinful anger over self-control
Whenever I “soberly estimate” who I am and how God has made me, I walk away both encouraged and challenged. I am simultaneously more aware of the gifts given to me to steward, as well as humbled by the truth of my sinfulness.
Living in the light of God’s grace gives us clarity about:
- the gifts we possess
- areas where He is calling us to grow
- our failures,
- and the means of redemption for those sins.
I am so thankful for the grace of God that lets me walk in the light.
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Tagged self-care, self-examination, sober estimation, Walk in the light 
I thought it would be helpful for us to see how women are described in the Bible, positively and negatively, as we strive to be godly women. This is a fairly exhaustive study of the word “woman” in the Bible, with all of its uses and descriptions (from the ESV version, so I may have missed some mentioned in other versions).
Not all of them will apply in each of our lives, and some are situation-specific… but perhaps one or many of these will catch your eye and inspire you in a particular area of your life.
POSITIVE or NEUTRAL BIBLICAL DESCRIPTIONS OF WOMEN:
- made by God (Gen 2:22)
- taken out of man (Gen 2: 23, 1 Cor 11:9)
- “beautiful in appearance” (Sarai– Gen 12, Rebekah– Gen 12, Bathsheba–2 Sam 11:2, Tamar– 2 Sam 14:27, 1 Ki 1:3-4)
- “pregnant” (Exod. 21:22, Is 26:17, and many, many more)
- “skillful” (Exod. 35:25)
- “tender” (Deut 28:56)
- “refined” (Deut 28:56)
- “delicate” (Deut. 28:56)
- “loved” (Jud 16:4)
- “worthy” (Ruth 3:14)
- not worthless (1 Sam 1:16)
- “discerning” (1 Sam 25:3)
- “wise” (2 Sam 14:2, 2 Sam 20:16, Prov 31:26)
- “wealthy” (2 Ki 4:8– the Shunammite woman who cared for Elisha)
- “barren, childless” given a home and children (Ps 113:9)
- “gracious” (Prov 11:16)
- receives honor (Prov 11:16)
- precious (Prov 31:10)
- trustworthy (Prov 31:11)
- interested in doing good for and pleasing her husband (Prov 31:12, Prov 31:23, 1 Cor 7:34)
- a willing worker (Prov 31:13, 19)
- prudent (Prov 31:16, 18)
- “strong” (Prov 31:17)
- diligent (Prov 31:18-22, Prov 31:27, Luke 15:8)
- generous (Prov 31:20)
- teacher of kindness (Prov 31:26)
- “excellent” (Prov 31:29)
- “woman who fears the Lord” (Prov 31:30– worthy of praise)
- great in faith (Matthew 15:20-28)
- worshipful, sacrificial, worthy of remembrance (Matt. 26:6-13)
- “saved” by faith (Luke 8:40)
- freed from disability (Luke 13:12)
- bearer of a faithful testimony that led many to believe (John 4:39)
- uncondemned by God (John 8:10-11)
- “believer” (Acts 16:1)
- “seller of purple goods” (Acts 16:4)
- “worshiper of God” with an open, attentive heart (Acts 16:4)
- unmarried/betrothed are interested in holiness & “the things of the Lord” (1 Cor 7:34)
- “glory of man” (1 Cor 11:7)
- not independent of man (1 Cor 11:11)
- “quiet” learner (1 Tim 2:11, 12)
- “submissive” (1 Tim 2:11)
- “weaker vessel” (1 Pet 3:7)
NEGATIVE BIBLICAL DESCRIPTIONS OF WOMEN:
- “drunken” (1 Sam 1:13– Eli was mistaken when he thought this about Hannah)
- “perverse, rebellious” (1 Sam 20:30– spoken by Saul to Jonathan about his mother in order to shame him)
- “desolate” (Tamar– 2 Sam 13:20, because she was defiled)
- “cursed” (2 Ki 9:34– Jezebel)
- “wicked” (2 Chr 24:7– idolatrous woman)
- “barren, childless” (Job 24:21)
- “forbidden woman” (Prov 2:16, 5:3, 5:20, 7:5– the adulteress)
- “evil” (Prov 6:24– the adulteress)
- wily of heart (Prov 7:10– a woman dressed as a prostitute)
- “a beautiful woman without discretion” is like a gold ring in a pig’s snout (Prov 11:22)
- “quarrelsome” & fretful (Prov 21:19– living with this kind of woman is worse than living in a desert)
- heart of snares & nets (Eccl 7:26– godly men escape her)
- deceived transgressor (1 Tim 2:14)
There’s a lot here, but I think it may be helpful to look at this both in a micro- and macro- way.
THE BIG PICTURE OF WOMANHOOD IN SCRIPTURE:
Generally, the biblical woman is discerning, gracious, generous, and kind. Generally, women are given a role defined by family and the home. Rather than seeking to control or manipulate men, the biblical woman is focused on the Lord, and her husband, children, and home (if married). A godly woman passes her faith on to others (specifically including her children and those who know her testimony), and sits at the feet of Jesus to love and worship Him.
THE NITTY-GRITTY OF WOMANHOOD IN SCRIPTURE:
First, what she is not: she is not quarrelsome or worrisome. She does not seek to ensnare, capture, or deceive men. She does not dress seductively. She doesn’t act thoughtlessly or without prudence. She works hard in order to serve her household, the poor, and widows. She worships God. She tells others what Christ has done for her. She learns with a quiet spirit, willing to submit to what is taught.
She is protected by the men in her family when she is a virgin (there were many instances of this, but these were not necessarily descriptive passages so I did not include them in the list), and focused on her family and home, once married. She serves her husband and is faithful to him. She seeks to make him known as an honorable man. She raises children, teaching them the Scriptures, kindness, wisdom, and faith. If unmarried, she is single-mindedly focused on serving Christ and being holy for Him.
She fearfully, faithfully, and attentively serves a gracious, forgiving, and healing Creator God by serving, loving, and giving to the people around her.
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Tagged Bible study, biblical teaching, God made us, mother, pregnant, virgin, wife, womanhood, Women 
Pain is common to all of us. But– have you noticed?– our reactions to it can be wildly different.
And I’m convinced– it’s all in how you look at it.
When our eyes are on our pain & circumstances:
- We become disconnected from others (even others in the Body of Christ).
- No one is “qualified” to encourage, exhort, instruct, or teach us (even with the authority of Scripture!), unless they’ve experienced the exact. same. thing. that we are experiencing (which of course disqualifies, basically, everyone), because our own experience is what is authoritative to us.
- Thus, we believe we can’t encourage, exhort, instruct, or teach others (even with the authority of Scripture), because we see others’ experiences as what is authoritative in their lives.
- The only acceptable method of communication with/to anyone in pain is listening. The therapeutic counselor’s couch who only listens, and never really says anything, becomes the best and highest hope we can offer anyone, because everyone is the sole arbiter of his/her own pain and needs.
- Pain becomes the great separator. We will tend to exalt our unique version of pain as higher, worse, more difficult, more tragic, more unapproachable, more hard-to-endure, (etc.) than anyone else’s pain.
- Gifts are either expected/demanded or refused. We may feel that others “owe” us because of our pain, or we may be unwilling to be vulnerable enough to accept help or gifts from others. Either way, it’s all about “me.”
- Instead of exalting Christ, SELF is exalted. Instead of, “there is no one like Jesus. He satisfies and cares for me like no other.”, the heart says things like, “No one else is hurting like me. No one else can understand me. No one else has been through what I’ve been through.”
But when we focus on our great REDEEMER, our SAVIOR, and HIS BEAUTIFUL ANSWERS for our pain & circumstances:
- We become connected with others in the Body because we view ourselves as intricately connected through a wonderful Savior who sustains us through the common experience of human pain and challenges.
- Others can encourage, exhort, instruct, or teach us with Scripture, wisdom, and the God-given comfort with which they themselves have been comforted, whether or not they’ve experienced the exact set of details we are experiencing, because we recognize Scripture as authoritative, all wisdom as from the Lord, and other humans as fellow-journeyers.
- We can encourage, exhort, instruct, or teach others with Scripture, because we recognize that it is the one thing that can divide between soul and spirit, and gives us the only words we can speak that can offer hope and healing.
- We are free to take time with hurting people using a variety of methods to connect and minister: listening, asking questions, sharing Scripture, exhorting, instructing, and sharing our experiences (and more) all become valid ways of connection and ministry, because we view Christ as the only One who can be all that someone needs, or give them all that they need in the exact “right” package.
- Pain becomes the great equalizer. We exalt Christ as the One who can break every chain, soothe every hurting heart, and heal every form of pain, no matter how tragic or different from the pain we’ve experienced.
- Gifts are gratefully received as evidence of God’s grace and care for us. When our eyes are on God, we see gifts and financial provision– whether from a believer, unbeliever, insurance company, or some other source– as ways that God is nurturing us and providing for us in our difficulties.
- Christ is exalted as the Great Mediator, the Great Suffering Servant, the Great Savior, who we all need, who identifies with us in our sorrows, and who has Himself borne more grief, shame, and suffering than any of us.
Which is your experience with pain & suffering?
- Do your hurts drive you to Christ, and toward His Body?
- Or do they drive you inward, pushing you further and further into isolation and self-exaltation?
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Tagged Body of Christ, God is FAITHFUL, suffering, trust God, We need one another! 
Last fall, we took our 12-year-old son away for a weekend of hiking and discussion while we worked through the Passport 2 Purity material together.
When we went for our longest hike, it was a blustery day with heavy winds. As we went deeper down into the canyon, the pines at the top of the hill loomed tall above us. Soon we heard sharp snapping noises. Swaying wildly, the trees too close to the edge of the pack, too tall, too top-heavy, and too unprotected from the wind, began to crack and fall with amazing speed, downward to the earth below.
The more I thought about it, the more it hit me: it’s an apt warning to us all.
- Don’t grow taller than your roots grow deep.
- Don’t be top-heavy, proud and puffy at the top but easily swayed by the winds.
- Don’t plant yourself away, unprotected, from the other trees.
You can’t expect to healthily grow while living purposefully far away from your local church Body. Don & Lori Chaffer, married couple at the helm of the band Waterdeep put it this way: “don’t walk away from the crowd.”
You can’t expect to healthily grow if you appear strong but have no one who can question the direction and top-heaviness of your growth. Three years ago, men like Mark Driscoll, Bill Gothard, Bob Coy, Doug Phillips stood at the head of large ministries. They’d each grown tall. They appeared strong.
But they, each of them, purposefully stood at a distance. They eschewed accountability, pulled away from anyone or anything that would have authority over them, and in time, like the pines we heard crack in the canyon, they cracked and fell. And, as they fell, each one damaged other saplings and trees that were growing around them.
It should bring sober awareness to us all.
“Let anyone who thinks that he stands
TAKE HEED, lest he fall.”
~ 1 Corinthians 10:12
- Beware when you look around you and only see a few, loose, weak fellow believers. Don’t plant yourself in a place where you are unprotected and unsurrounded.
- Realize, no matter how tall you seem to be, that you are weaker– more vulnerable– than you think you are. You can fall… I can fall… easier than we may believe.
- We should focus on growing as part of a healthy forest. Don’t try to go it alone. Don’t just focus on your own “height” or health. Plant yourself amongst others who are healthily growing… be a integral PART of a strong local Body of Christ.
Thoughts?
What warnings would you add?
What observations come to your mind when you see Christian leaders fall?
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Tagged Body of Christ, Christian leaders, Grow on purpose, healthy growth, local church, spiritual growth 
In 2011, I took my first biblical counseling class, and one session focused on the “Anti-Psalm.” The goal was to better understand what a text is saying by carefully thinking through the exact opposite meaning. It can be insightful to see the “opposite” of a text, and gives an excellent way to clarify the actual meaning.
I previously did this with Proverbs 31.
Let’s do it today with Titus 2. Here’s that text, as written:
But as for you, teach what accords with sound doctrine. Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness.
Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.
Here’s my proposal for its opposite:
“But as for you, refrain from teaching altogether. Or, if and when you teach, teach sloppily. Say what sounds and feels good; don’t fuss with stodgy old doctrine. Older men should be preoccupied with jokes, undignified, careless, undiscerning, and immature in things of God. They should be cold and detached from people, inconsistent and undependable.
Like them, older women should be insincere, jokers, continually gossiping about and judging people around them, and known as drunken women. Ideally, they should keep to women their own age and refrain from teaching the younger women anything. But if they teach, they should teach non-important, non-eternal things. They should laugh with the younger women about their silly husbands, and by their example and words encourage the younger women to criticize and belittle their husbands. They should teach them to be uncommitted to and unconcerned about the long-term good of their children, seeking self-fulfillment and self-promotion above all else. They should teach younger women to be slaves to the pleasures of life, encourage indiscretion and carelessness in what they listen to and watch, to prioritize their work outside the home and justify laziness inside of it, to be critical and cruel in their judgments toward others, and to question and buck their husband’s authority. They should not ever teach the younger women to connect their choices in regard to marriage, family, and home, with the reputation of the Word of God.”
QUESTIONS FOR YOUNGER WOMEN:
- What are you learning from older women?
- Are you living your life in such a way, growing in the things Titus 2 describes, so that you will be able to teach these things when you are older?
QUESTIONS FOR OLDER WOMEN:
- What do your words and actions say to younger women?
- Are you obeying the commands laid out in Titus 2? Are you TEACHING?
- Do you call the same things “good” that God calls “good?”
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SIGN UP now & I’ll send it your way: Posted in Grow as a Church Member, Grow as a Disciple, Grow as a Woman, Grow as Homemaker, Grow as Mom, Grow as Wife
Tagged Bible study, homemaker, mother, Older women, Titus 2 Woman, Titus2, wife, Younger women 
We try to squeeze as much as we can into a given moment. On any given day, a mom can be seen:
- carrying the groceries in (loaded down like a donkey),
- calling instructions to the kids over our shoulder,
- using the tiniest sliver of our index finger (otherwise weighed down with groceries) to open the gate,
- kicking the gate closed with our feet,
- already mentally planning which steps need to be done in which order, in order to have dinner prepared in less than 20 minutes, so we can nurse the baby when he wakes up in 25 minutes.
But sometimes there’s a tendency to think that we have to have silence and solitude in order to meditate or enter into spiritual truth in a deep way. That the schedule has to be cleared in order to intake spiritual “food”.
Have you found yourself believing, like I have, that if you could just get away from daily demands, THEN you'd have time to retreat and find rest for the soul?
But one of the things I’ve come to know over the course of my time as a mom is this: silence and solitude and beautiful and rare… but a peaceful heart and calm spirit can happen in any setting, at any time.
“silence and solitude and beautiful and rare…
but a peaceful heart and calm spirit can happen in any setting, at any time.”
~Jess Connell
HOW TO MULTI-TASK for SPIRITUAL GROWTH:
It’s as easy as this. As often as possible, combine one item from list A with one item from list B:
In a nutshell, use those times where the mind is free to fill it up with things that are meaty and spiritual and encouraging. Don’t let the time fritter away and go to waste. That’s not to say every moment has to be filled with noise. Moments of just letting my mind be at rest, and nestling into solitude, can be healing and helpful.
But our minds are not naturally bent toward godliness. If we perpetually give our minds nothing on which to focus, we will easily drift into:
- negativity– replaying hurtful conversations, or replaying hurt and criticism and reviewing failures.
- self-focus— mentally jotting down a list of things we “never” get or “always” have to do, replaying compliments and reviewing “successes”, or
- busybodying about others– reviewing things they did (or didn’t) say, things they did (or didn’t) do, thinking of things they should (or shouldn’t) say, things they should (or shouldn’t) do.
Instead, we can click on the audioBible or head to YouTube (or a sermon app) and turn on a sermon by Chandler, MacArthur, Piper, Chan, Harris, Keller, Platt… we have, at our fingertips, such a large number of excellent Bible preachers!
PURPOSEFULLY MULTI-TASK!
Let me encourage you to try it– or do it more often: Give your mind something on which to focus during tasks when your hands or body are busy doing something otherwise mindless.
DON'T LET THIS BE A POINT OF LEGALISM OR GUILT FOR YOU.
By all means, take time to enjoy the silence nursing your new baby… or if the kids have been at it all day, enjoy the solitude and relaxation of a hot, quiet bath. But in moments when your mind craves something to do, or would tend toward self-focus or busybodying about other people, my encouragement for you is to give your mind something to do– combine list A with list B and let God renew your heart, mind, and soul as you go about your daily activities.
Sign up to receive my monthly newsletter, and I’ll send you my FREE book, ONE THING: Top Tip (From a Mom of 6). In it, you’ll learn the top way I:
- BEAT the “Mommy Wars”, and
- HAVE PEACE in my parenting decisions.
SIGN UP now & I’ll send it your way: Posted in Grow as a Disciple, Grow as a Woman, Grow as Homemaker, Grow as Mom, Grow as Wife
Tagged discipleship, Grow on purpose, multi-tasking, personal growth, spiritual growth, womanhood 
Living something brings a keen awareness of how others view it.
Until you are a stay-home mom, you may not realize how others demean that work by using words like “only” or “just” to describe it.
Until my husband became a pastor, I didn’t realize the walls that sometimes are built in people’s hearts (as evidenced on their face) the minute that fact escapes our lips. Suddenly, the conversation adjusts, and certain things get hidden or go unspoken. With the knowledge of that one fact, it seems that many people become less willing to let us see their warts, and more likely to see us as hyper-spiritual people without everyday, human struggles.
“I’M A WRITER”
Similarly, when I identify myself a writer (or worse –!!!– as a “blogger”), certain reactions come.
Some people take it seriously, but many (most?) don’t.
While some friends and relatives are very supportive, some relatives who would be overjoyed if I left the walls of our home and got a job as a teacher, political campaign worker, medical transcriptionist– frankly, ANYTHING but being a mom– seem utterly uninterested by the fact that I’ve been writing consistently for over 8 years and now get paid for that work (while being privileged enough to be present, raising my kids at the same time–score!).
A friend asked, about my writing, “Well, isn’t it insignificant, in the whole scheme of things?”
INSIGNIFICANT?
And here’s the thing. I want to answer delicately and graciously, but I also need to be honest:
No.
It’s not. It’s not insignificant in the whole scheme of things.
I would not put forth the time to write if I thought it was insignificant.
EVALUATING OUR PERSPECTIVE AS BELIEVERS
Frankly, as a Christian, I don’t believe anything that we do “as unto the Lord” is insignificant. The things we purposefully do, with eternity in mind, are the things that are inherently laced with significance.
SO, QUESTION:
- When is a blog not “just” a blog?
- When is a blogger not “just” blowing smoke and contributing to internet noise?
MY ANSWERS:
- When that blog, or that blogger, is focused on Godly, eternal things.
- When the blogger is processing things in their lives in order to comprehend and glorify God.
- When that blogger is writing “as unto the Lord.”
That’s when.
Call my SpadesPlus score or the specific way I fold bathroom hand towels insignificant, and you’d be right.
Look at the make & model of the car I drive, and call that insignificant, sure.
A Facebook picture of my dinner plate at a restaurant, or my thrift store find, may also be insignificant “in the whole scheme of things.”
But no, I don’t think my work encouraging Christian women to passionately grow in their relationships with the Lord is insignificant. Not at all.
IN THE COMMENTS, PLEASE SHARE:
What do you think?
- Do you agree that blogging can be meaningful?
- Or am I wrong? —> is it insignificant in the whole scheme of things?
Sign up to receive my monthly newsletter, and I’ll send you my FREE book, ONE THING: Top Tip (From a Mom of 6). In it, you’ll learn the top way I:
- BEAT the “Mommy Wars”, and
- HAVE PEACE in my parenting decisions.
SIGN UP now & I’ll send it your way: Posted in Grow as Writer
Tagged blogging, self-publishing, writing, writing a blog, writing fiction, writing non-fiction 
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