Q: I know my son needs to be trained out of some of the bad behaviors he’s picked up over the last 6 months of having a really loose schedule, but I feel so angry at him. I am so worn out and he talks back so much, and all I want to do is give up and not be around him. What do I do?
A: First, let me say… I get this. It’s so easy to feel defeated and angry when we’re dealing with major issues in our children.
But don’t give up and don’t give in!
Hang in there. Commit yourself to be patient and consistent, no matter how many times the exact same discipline is required.
If you take time to consider the long-term effects of NOT disciplining faithfully, in a godly manner, it might give you the patient long-term view you need to deal with this firmly and faithfully, without anger and irritation. God is giving you a vantage point of seeing yourself and him with accuracy, and giving you the opportunity to discipline yourself, and your son, in order to bring glory to God in your home and in your relationship.
And God will help you! He’s helping you SEE, and He’ll help you grow in patience and kindness and self-control and perseverance as you strive for faithfulness in this area of discipline.
Each time your son back talks, patiently stop him and have him repeat what he ought to say in that moment. Give him the words he OUGHT to use. And wait for him to say them. You can even practice several times.
Hang in there and don’t give up.
“And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” ~Galatians 6:9
FOLLOW-UP Q: When we are in the middle of homeschooling, and my son does something he shouldn’t do, or pulls an attitude, what should that look like? I think he benefits from having a schedule, but should we stop having school until his attitude is retrained to what it should be?
I’m afraid it wouldn’t go well if we had no routine in order to deal with discipline all day.